James Baldwin – The Giver (for Berdis) – A Poem

If the hope of giving
is to love the living,
the giver risks madness
in the act of giving.

Some such lesson I seemed to see
in the faces that surrounded me.

Needy and blind, unhopeful, unlifted,
what gift would give them the gift to be gifted?

The giver is no less adrift
than those who are clamouring for the gift.

If they cannot claim it, if it is not there,
if their empty fingers beat the empty air
and the giver goes down on his knees in prayer
knows that all of his giving has been for naught
and that nothing was ever what he thought
and turns in his guilty bed to stare
at the starving multitudes standing there

and rises from bed to curse at heaven,
he must yet understand that to whom much is given
much will be taken, and justly so:
I cannot tell how much I owe.
 
Credit: PoemHunter.com

We Cannot Assume Responsibility For A Loved One’s Death – Grief

Those of Us who are walking the same path on this long journey called Grief, please know that there are others out there who would love to talk to You, who understand what You are going through because they are either going through it presently or have gone through in the past. Grief never leaves, it just becomes “DORMANT,” asleep, until that something, someone, favorite quote, television show, song, food, smell, or we happen to see a stranger that favors our loved one, and in walks Grief, right on queue and the tears flow like a river wild, the heartbreaks all over again, our head starts spinning, and our knees feel weak.  That is not even the end of it, because, for many, the Guilt sets in and they assume responsibility for their loved one’s death. By assuming responsibility for a loved one’s death, we risk getting stuck in our grief.

We cannot assume responsibility for our loved one’s death.  Ultimately our lives are in the hands of God. Here is something for each of Us to ponder on: “Psalm 139:16 states that our life every day is measured, meaning simply that God knows the exact time that we will die.  He knows when He is going to call us home.  There is nothing you can do to extend your life span one-tenth of a second. “No death is simply the result of circumstances, an accident or fate. This does not mean God wanted our loved one to die or is morally responsible for the death. It means the same God who loved Us enough to die for our sins, is the same God who is in control.

How can a loving God be in control, yet our loved one still died?  We may never fully understand that. But that is why, frequently and lovingly, the Bible reminds us that God’s ways are too complex for us to understand. That is also why when we see chaos all around us, we should remind ourselves of God’s ultimate demonstration of His love and concern for us, the cross upon which He died for our sins.

Remember…Nothing is outside God’s control!

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