- “I have to keep reminding myself that I’m an adult and will be charged as one.”
- “Just before I die, I am going to swallow a bag of popcorn kernels. My cremation is going to be epic!”
- “I’d walk through fire for my best friend. Well, not fire, that would be dangerous. But a super humid room…but not too humid because, you know… my hair.”
- “You love flowers, but you cut them. You love animals, but you eat them. You tell me you love me, so now I’m scared!”
- Next time a stranger talks to me when I’m alone, I will look at them shocked and whisper quietly “You can see me?”
- “The strongest people make time to help others, even if they are struggling with their own problems.”
- “One minute you’re really young and cool… and the next, you’re getting all excited about a new vacuum.”
- “If I wanted to listen to an asshole, I would fart…”
- “Friends buy you a lunch. Best friends eat your lunch.”
- “That moment when you realize it wasn’t a fart”
